Kisses At Large

I've alluded to my difficulties connecting with solvency. I have theories about this. The theories vary with the brew and the season. Which infers perhaps to the salient aspect on why solvency might be an issue. But life does not bore me enough to even go into it, lol, I'll leave that to the folks who make their bed in the morning. Why waste sunrise moments. Um, that is, if I were up that early. lol.

Though to subvert conclusions forming, I don't really care when I get up. I do remember a time jogging as the sun rose. (Youth is ephemeral, and somewhat bouncy.) But even later I have painted landscapes at nature's first green. Those colors rock. They really are worth hitting coffee in a drive thru on your way to a cold grey predawn scene.

But getting back to solvency and my tortured relationship to it. (I don't like talking to my mortgage company. One peculiar quality of a mortgage company I've noticed is, if you don't like an answer just hang up and call again. I have never gotten the same answer twice. lol. For real. lol. Its odd but I do, seriously, find that faceless conglomerate very personally not nice.)

So referencing kisses at large and solvency and whatever connection might be drawn to the 2. Clicking through etsy I saw this in Spamberly's shop.

I've not seen the movie. "waiting for guffman." And the probability that I'll see it is low. But, I can hear a laconic voice saying "i been workin' here at the d.q. for about um...eight months? seven? i don't know, somethin' like that, it's fun. just do the cones...make sundaes, make blizzards, 'n...put stuff on 'em, 'n...see a lot of people come in, a lot of people come to the d.q...burgers...ice cream...anything, you know? cokes...just drive in and get a coke, if you're thirsty."
My legs couldn't handle that job. My sense of humor would probably fail. But I'm there! "just drive in and get a coke, if you're thirsty."

Happiness. Or maybe some satisfaction. Or enjoyment of the pursuit. Whatever. The colors are out there. ;)

Change Is Tough

(Well, in football it is. I read about the end of the salary cap after the 2009 season, and I don't know. NFL franchises are money making machines. And in the past, players have not benefited from the money stream. The retired players, with health problems, did not receive the health care or financial support from the game they helped develop into the popular sport it is today. The players do make money now, but not as much as is first reported. A guy can get cut after 8 games, after being signed for 70 million. To me the success of the New England Patriots has been a perfect trifecta of good owner, good coach, and good quarterback (and team.) How you divie up that money pie I don't know. I hope it gets resolved for the benefit of all. There should be enough to go around.)

This brings me to the nation situation, as it were. With the financial implosion going on, jobs hiding where I can begin to find, and home foreclosures of record setting levels to where the "American dream" resembles a wild west ghost town, in fog. How hard can change be? CHANGE IS TOUGH! Jeeza loui-za peoples. Tuesday night even after Ohio and Penn went down, I couldn't believe. I didn't, and still have trouble wrapping my mind around it. Jeesh.

Not only did Americans elect the first African American to the presidency.... he's got a funny name. (Sorry people, but Barack HUSSIEN Obama? Next to your Smith or Jones, or Washington or Jackson...) The American people chose possibility and hope over fear and stereotypes. Obama had a massive amount of money that I only wished I could have donated to. *I did buy a t-shirt!* But he needed it. He needed a freaking bulldozer. He had lots of sh*t to plough through.

But the American people stepped up. I'm still amazed. I'm watching the Pats (vs Bills) right now, seeking grounding or something.... so maybe I can blame the tears in my eyes on a football loss. But those fools are winning. You just never know.

Flagrant Tulips, Flash On!

There he is, the yellow fellow in my yard. I think I've disturbed the tulips enough that... their number seems to be diminishing. Whether its my weeding (no weed killer here! Killer *of the environment* being *not* the clue!)... or my lack of fertilizer... whatever they ain't there so much any more. And I kinda like them. Next fall I'm going to randomly plant a bunch of tulips and daffodils. Keeps me on my toes. And prods Spring along.

Spring needing an occasional prod I suppose... Here's a picture of the most recent manifestation of my earthy ineffectual obsession... the digging up of a yew hedge. Jeesh. At first I liked the pink of that rhodendrum... Having bought all my bushes on sale at Fall's edge, I wasn't sure what colors would express themselves this Spring, let alone live. But, ah, whatever.

Another shot of my yard. A Daphne (how sweet is that name?), a Dogwood (earthy and dependable), a rhodendrum (a color like acrylic surviving unfaded), and ferns, cautiously unfolding.

When buying marigolds at "X"... I saw some honey bees on the plants in the industrialized homogenized impersonified space that is the "X" store. And that made me feel good. I buy marigolds the way some people wave flags. I buy marigolds the way I take my place in a grocery store line or sweep my driveway. Its just one of those things... endemic and intrinsic to a sense of self. Along with the marigolds... there were those freakin' bees. How much better can it be? Spring has sprung and I'm there with a shovel.

When planting... I watched a lone honey bee weirdly dig into the ground. The honey bee was obviously diseased, obviously dying.... I couldn't bring myself to kill it. I love those freakin' flyin' sugar packets of spring! I hope that the severe problem our environment faces at this time doesn't lead to just drink, or hyperactive profit management, but to solutions that can bring more... ya know... those colors!

Polls, the NFL, an Elliptical, and a Rosebush

(I like lists. Not to grocery shop with... I've found that if I'm going to forget something I can do it just as well without a list as with one.)

People do tend to denigrate polls as hype... but they serve a function. Between February third and August 7th, there are only 2 days of excitement for those of us not into baseball basketball or are trying hard to ignore world or financial affairs, and that is today and tomorrow, the NFL draft. Other than that... there's the polls. And an elliptical, which I should mention as a way of sort of exercising on it.

I am a Patriots fan. When the Pats play my two primary desires are that they win and nobody gets injured. Its *crushing* when... well. We (me) won't go into past losses... Jersey decorum its called. *Or that's what its called by me... wimpishness could be applied but let's stick with a no-cement-that-time jersey decorum.* My life is affected yes... slamming your forehead onto a bar at the conclusion of the one but most important loss of a season does affect your equilibrium for a while, but it does not affect your personal plans like should I vacation in the middle east next year.

Whereas political polls... You root for whom you think is best... The anxiety of a future with crumbling ice caps and confused migrating birds, can not be diminished even with a 6 pack. Even blurry eyed, the glass is near empty. The supreme optimist could detect tequila where others see desert.... But polls are once removed. They are numbers. Numbers in red alongside faces, that's true... but like a score card in the things-that-matter but you never-can-see.... polls are touchdowns in these tenuous times.

But frankly? Can't the NFL do something more before August this year? I'll start things off with Marvin Gaye and the Star Spangled Banner and forget the rosebush.

Long Lines and Cold Wet Feet

I went to a political rally today... first eva! I've never been to one before because... well. It involves crowds, traffic, and canned language. And, I usually know who I want to vote for. And, I'm not big on celebrity type stuff. But today I went. Where the speech was going to take place is only a 10-15 minute drive from where I live... I started getting an idea of the number of folks heading in the same general direction after about the second turn. Its like, I know where you're going. So I parked maybe 5 blocks away and walked... along with all the others doing the same thing.

It snowed yesterday and melted a lot today, leaving serious minded puddles pushing pedestrians into the road. But, that was okay as the traffic wasn't moving much. As we (I'd gotten to talking to a Lutheran minister) approached the arena, I became apprehensive about our ability to make it in. The line was major.

And here in this major line... among the great mix of the people of Providence Rhode Island... I mentioned this video I'd seen on youtube... about the fainting Obama women. How I might become one with what turned into a 3 1/2 hr wait in line and inside. Well. I didn't have too! Some other lady did. Its too funny. Maybe its like a thing? Is there a club or something?

But, it was fun. I'm so happy Obama visited this small state. My impression was totally positive. Though I must say... Obama did seem to get lost a few times while talking. And one line really stuck out as kinda silly... like did he fall asleep with a romance novel on his face or something? That line wandered in from somewhere... but given that that wasn't his first stop of the day or the first stop of this stop... he'd spoken to the overflow crowd first before addressing us ready to fainters... Given all that, it was pretty fine.

Reasoning Reasons

Okay. Yet another explaination.. of the title for "Fluff" this time.
(I like to wax philisophical, as it were. To lean back in a comfortable chair, clutch a cold brew, and to fuss at the universe with a teaspoon of not so well intellengized reason. But occassionally I find I have less inclination or time or fatigue or there's strong web of preoccupation entangling the small rodent that is my brain...)
Anyway, that's my excuse for not updating my blog for a while. Thought I'd get that explaination out of the way first...

Now as to "Fluff." The first reason for the title is: I like it. And of course, in my small hemetically sealed world, that is most important. The second is something I've seen a couple of times in my anemic purusal of the art/neo-art/art-a-fart... wanna fart... (where was I?)... ART world. That is, the motivating force of vengence.

Years ago, a lady that is (I'll assume present tense) a wonderful repesentational watercolorist talked about motivation... She said how when she was starting out... she painted a couple of watercolor paintings, and through a fluke, they were fantastic. A gallery expressed interest and asked for more work. Her subsequent work stunk. She spent 3 years relearning how to paint, and why those first couple of paintings were so good. During that time, whenever someone made a disparaging remark, she put them on a list. When she was in a small show and the guy that hung the show put her piece back by the trash cans, she put him on the list. The list was for her first one person show. And that guy hung the show.

Another artist was told the material she used was "cafty." As in, not good enough for art. Or something like that. Who knows what he was talking about except that he was disparaging in a unengaged abstact I'm-just-bad-mouthing type way. That artist is now fairly successful using just those "crafty" materials... (will print name after okay.)

Now to "Fluff." I showed a ring I'd carved to a fellow employee.... his response was "fluff." He didn't know it was mine... But. The fellow has made my list... (not that, actually, I think "fluff" negative. Neither is "crafty" for that matter.)

Such scheming and whatnot requires... success. "Getting yours" doesn't count if, well, you don't get yours. You can clutch your shopping cart as vehemently as you wish but if you are homeless.... people will walk around you. (Though. they still might not wish to be on any list of yours.)

I'm up to fifty-two cents in my lottery-retirement wanna-suceed with-change-off-the-street fund. Somehow it all hangs together... I think....